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Tammy Letherer
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The Buddha at My Table: How I Found Peace in Betrayal and Divorce Paperback – October 16, 2018

by Tammy Letherer (Author)
4.5 4.5 out of 5 stars 54 ratings
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Can you come sit at the table? Tammy Letherer’s husband of twelve years spoke these words on a Tuesday night, just before Christmas, after he had put their three children in bed. He had a piece of paper and two fingers of scotch in front of him. As he read from the list in his hand, his next words would shatter her world and destroy every assumption she'd ever made about love, friendship, and faithfulness.

In The Buddha at My Table, Letherer describes―in honest, sometimes painful detail―the dismantling of a marriage that encompasses the ordinary and the surreal, including the night she finds a silent, smiling Thai monk sitting at the same dining room table. It’s this unexpected visitation, this personification of peace, that sticks with her as she listens to her husband reveal hurtful, shocking things―that he never loved her, he doesn’t believe in monogamy, and he wants to “wrap things up” with her in four weeks―and allows her to find the blessing in her husband’s betrayal. Ultimately, it’s when she realizes that she is participating in her life, not at its mercy, that she discovers the path to freedom.
Previous page
  1. Print length
    224 pages
  2. Language
    English
  3. Publisher
    She Writes Press
  4. Publication date
    October 16, 2018
  5. Dimensions
    5.25 x 0.75 x 8.25 inches
  6. ISBN-10
    1631524259
  7. ISBN-13
    978-1631524257
  8. See all details
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Editorial Reviews

Review

2020 NYC Big Book Award
2019 Chicago Writers Association Book of the Year
2018 Living Now Book Award
2018 Human Relations Indie Book Award, Finalist
2018 Best Book Award, Finalist
2018 National Indie Excellence Award

“Readers will be captivated by the bold storytelling and colorful expression in Tammy Letherer’s memoir, The Buddha at my Table… The honesty, humor, and inspiration in Tammy’s story make it a must-read.”
—Betty Hafner, Author of Not Exactly Love: A Memoir

“In her new book, Tammy Letherer writes candidly and honestly of the demise of her marriage and its impact on the lives of her family and herself. Although the story of unexpected divorce is sadly becoming all too familiar, few have written as clearly or as frankly about it as Letherer has done here. Not only does she take the reader step by step through her experience, she also explores her role in the unraveling of the relationship. Through her exploration, she gains awareness into the person she is and the person she wants to be. She shares her insights and offers a helpful and hopeful journey for herself and others experiencing a similar situation. This was a book I was unable to put down. I am confident others will find it beneficial and engaging as well.”
—Kathryn Taylor, author of Two Minus One

“The Buddha at My Table is an honest journey through the death of a marriage and rebirth of one of life’s most unnurtured forces: resilience. In this inspiring memoir, Letherer’s prose resonates effortlessly with anyone who has ever suffered an unexpected loss of love, a loss that, for the author, proves to be a disguised blessing on the path to finding her heart. The road is bumpy, sometimes sinuous, yet Letherer has a special way of keeping us right by her side. When she writes, ‘There’s a sense that I’m participating in life, not at its mercy,’ you realize just how far she’s come. A wonderfully written and remarkably relatable account.“
—Jonna Spilbor, attorney, legal analyst, and creator of Divorce Boss

“Tammy Letherer holds up every piece of a shattered marriage and finds a way to make each one reflect the light. In doing so, she affirms the teaching from A Course in Miracles that says ‘All your past except its beauty is gone and nothing is left but a blessing.’ These pages will point you toward peace.”
―Maureen Muldoon, author of The Spiritual Vixen's Guide to an Unapologetic Life

“The Buddha at My Table is a balm for divorcing moms and exactly the . . . words we need when everything in our lives is changing.”
—Jessica Ashley, the Divorce Coach for Moms and founder of Single Mom Nation

About the Author

Tammy Letherer is a writing coach, blogger, and author of the novel Hello Loved Ones. She lives in Chicago with her three children and enjoys yoga, swing dancing, reading a good novel, Earl Grey tea, and spending time outdoors. Read her blogs about creativity, spirituality, and the writing life on the Huffington Post or visit her at TammyLetherer.com.

Product details

  • Publisher ‏ : ‎ She Writes Press (October 16, 2018)
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • Paperback ‏ : ‎ 224 pages
  • ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 1631524259
  • ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-1631524257
  • Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 11.2 ounces
  • Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 5.25 x 0.75 x 8.25 inches
  • Customer Reviews:
    4.5 4.5 out of 5 stars 54 ratings

About the author

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Tammy Letherer

Tammy Letherer

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Tammy Letherer is a writing coach, blogger, and author. She lives in Chicago with her three children and enjoys yoga, swing dancing, reading a good novel, Earl Grey tea, and spending time outdoors. Read her blogs about creativity, spirituality, and the writing life on the Huffington Post, or visit her at TammyLetherer.com.

Customer reviews

4.5 out of 5 stars
4.5 out of 5
54 global ratings
Honest, powerful, inspiring
5 Stars
Honest, powerful, inspiring
A friend gave this book to me, knowing the situation I have been going through is similar... the end of my marriage by my partner’s affair, and yet more. I began to read ‘The Buddha at my Table’ that evening, and finished it by the next morning. I felt as though in many ways, the author Letherer was writing my story, my feelings. She is deeply honest, from the moment the world as she knew it crashed down, to processing through that as a partner, woman, parent, friend, to discovering the angst, despair, hope, joy, and strength within her. I loved her raw honesty... which felt brave to acknowledge and write and share about. I loved how she maneuvered through what, for me also, was the most challenging dark period of her life and rose above it, drawing from the tools she had gathered throughout her life. There are days I have wondered how to put one foot in front of the other. Letherer encouraged me to understand on a deeper level how that too is part of this journey, and how we can not only begin to leap, but also to fly.
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Top reviews from the United States

Lelah C. Mahoney
5.0 out of 5 stars Everyone will find themselves here
Reviewed in the United States on March 16, 2024
Verified Purchase
This memoir speaks to my heart. Tammy Letherer opens up and shares what must’ve been a very difficult “chapter” of her life. The devastation, decisions, and self discovery she takes the reader through is bumpy but well worth the ride. I could relate to so much of Tammy’s story. You will too.
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VaVaVroom
5.0 out of 5 stars I couldn't stop reading!
Reviewed in the United States on June 12, 2022
Verified Purchase
I loved this book. I cried. I laughed. I reflected on my life. I was reminded of the spiritual principles that have gotten me through so many hard times. And it was comforting to also remember that life is hard sometimes, but we can overcome challenges and be better than ever. Well-written. Intriguing. Vulnerable. Well done!
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Joseph J. Gabriel
5.0 out of 5 stars An Engaging Page Turner
Reviewed in the United States on December 18, 2018
Verified Purchase
I could not put this book down. The author's unique spin on a common human condition (divorce) is fresh and highly engaging. She freely exposes her raw human emotions and insecurities, yet has deep spiritual insights and realizations that reveal she is a wise soul. And she expresses her experiences beautifully. For example, sitting on the couch with her three kids after her father dies of coronary disease, she describes as “four ventricles of a beating heart.” I love that! There are so many more, with every chapter ending with a gem. I also love the many synchronicities that pop up sprinkled throughout the chapters. Finally, how the author sees Dave (her ex) mirrored in her relationship with Paul (her new love interest), and realizes we are all one. How beautiful that is! So many times this book touched my heart!
One person found this helpful
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kmurph31
4.0 out of 5 stars Not a Great Comfort for Comiseration
Reviewed in the United States on January 11, 2021
The Buddha at My Table by Tammy Letherer

The author hears those dreaded words from her husband Dave.
"I have to tell you something and I want you to let me get through it without interrupting me
because it will be hard for me."
He begins to tell her that about ten years ago he had an affair that he ended pretty quickly. Then he tells her he has been using escort services. Then he tells her that three weeks ago when he was in Las Vegas he met someone.

Wow! To say that the author experiences the feeling she is going to be sick is an understatement. I found her husband to be very selfish and narcissistic. This woman is in shock and primal panic. She is in shock and this book is about her resilience in rebuilding her life. Anybody that hears a confession like her husband just made would be as knocked for a loop as much as she was.

He has plans to move into the apartment upstairs within four weeks, only the tenant currently living there doesn't know eviction is near. The reaction that she has is understandable. She and he continue to live together for a time. She seems to need him and the writing and descriptions are somewhat hard to focus on because she is in denial and thinks that she can fix their marriage by bringing up the question of how to tell the children.

The following chapter she is visualizing how she is going to redecorate and remodel for the up coming holidays. Her imagination into past holidays and all of her thinking processes took away from the blow that hearing this kind of news and made the narrative some what disjointed from her situation. Dave the authors husband has his girlfriend listed in his phone as his boss named Ken.

The writing is witty at times like when the author hears her husband's phone and she runs in the locked closet with a message from "Ken." She responds by asking, "are you or are you not going to leave my husband alone? Should I send you a pic of our kids?" How these husband and wife could remain cohabiting in the same house after his life altering confession is beyond me. It was overall not what I was expecting, but still inspirational to see this author rebuild her life and become the best version of herself.
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Dawn L. Anderson
5.0 out of 5 stars Sometimes it’s hard to read a familiar tale
Reviewed in the United States on April 25, 2019
Verified Purchase
I confess, It was hard for me to read until Tammy started freeing herself from her fears. The writing is stellar, the reader just finds Tammy’s personal struggle too familiar. I encourage you, the potential reader to dive in even if your own story is vastly different. Tammy has something important to say and her courage to bare her soul may be exactly what you need.
One person found this helpful
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Donna On a Journey
3.0 out of 5 stars Misleading Title
Reviewed in the United States on November 25, 2018
Verified Purchase
I bought this in large part because based on the title and the description, I thought the author had some incorporation of Buddhist principles or ideas that she used to get through a difficult time and/or for self-growth. I was interested in that. I know authors don't always choose the title, but this book has nothing to do with that. There is a brief incident that occurs in the book that I did not take to have that much significance to author. If anything, the author is most deeply impacted by Bible passages and Mysticism. Nothing wrong with that for her story, but that is not the title of the book. I read a lot of memoirs. I was interested in the story, but I did find the author to be a little self-absorbed. I wish her all the best in her life going forward.
7 people found this helpful
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Todd Ryan
5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent read!
Reviewed in the United States on October 24, 2018
Verified Purchase
The writer takes you on a journey of devastation, healing and ultimately, recovery without asking the ready to pity her. Throughout the narrative, the reader can sense an inner strength that will surely prevail. Transparent emotions on every page but not overwrought. Superb ability to draw the reader along trial by trial and win by win. Highly recommended!
One person found this helpful
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Sarah R.
5.0 out of 5 stars Captivating story that will break your heart and give you hope.
Reviewed in the United States on October 23, 2018
Verified Purchase
I devoured this book and was impressed with Letherer's ability to self examine her feelings in a very honest manner during a very difficult time and come out with more self actualization and strength of character at the end. The story is captivating and intimate. There is no handbook for navigating betrayal and divorce but Letherer's book would be helpful for anyone that may be experiencing something similar.
One person found this helpful
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